catapult magazine

Waiting

by Stephanie Smith

Driving back from our cup of coffee, i asked Amy what she was waiting for. We agreed patience has been the running theme of our lives. Mostly because i am very bad at it. What am i waiting for?  i got home and made a list. When i think about it i am nearly always waiting for something, no matter how insignificant. 

My hair to dry.

My coffee to drip.

Autumn to come.

The noise to end.

My film to develop.

An honest word.

i think WAITING is like a kind of dam: it is a stop and stay that creates depth. Waiting inspires what you already have to deepen and strengthen. Without waiting, our lives would be stretched thin to brittleness; without it, there would be no time to reflect, to repent, to change our minds. Our lives would be pure speed with no breaths in between; we would stampede through existence so fast that we would forget our last experience the moment we collided with the next one.

Maybe waiting allows all these things to SETTLE. Our busy lives beg a little time to be interpreted. What may seem like a denial or a boundary may instead be a reservoir: a holding place for all that we have come through so far, to be sorted and sifted. Waiting gives us room to collect the deep, to listen and hear whatever God has for us. It provides us with the time to grow.